Happy Wedding Season 2015
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Friday, April 17, 2015
Sunday, March 23, 2014
Wedding Checklist
Wedding Checklist
WEDDING PREPARATION CHECKLIST FOR A NIGERIAN (AFRICAN) WEDDING
******Many people find this checklist very useful and as such we get a lot of reprints. We appreciate that. Should you choose to reprint or republish, please credit FabNaija.com. That's all we ask. Thank you! If you would like a budget tailored to Nigerian weddings, please e-mail alima.okon@hotmail.com and make your subject FABNAIJA BUDGET.
This checklist is tailored to Nigerian weddings. We've attempted to prepare a comprehensive checklist of things to do before a Nigerian-flavored wedding in the U.S. Before you even start going through the checklist, be sure to determine your budget, which will be determined in large part by the number of people you plan to invite. Also, we understand the traditional wedding and the wedding ceremony are both important occasions, however, for convenience, we refer to the traditional wedding as such and to the so-called white wedding as the “Wedding.”
In preparing this schedule, we researched some schedules on other websites, compiled and streamlined them to suit a Nigerian wedding. We really liked the one on this website: http://weddings.about.com/blchecklist1.htm and have included some of their tips. We’ve highlighted things that are specific to a Nigerian wedding.
SCHEDULE OF PREPARATIONS10 to 12 Months Before The Wedding
• Book the wedding hall (fix time, officiant)
• Book time for rehearsal in the wedding hall 1 or 2 days before the wedding
• Book Reception Hall: consider a place close to the wedding hall
• Choose someone to decorate the hall
• Book hall for the traditional wedding: (A good number of people do this wedding within their residences)
• Choose your wedding colors. Remember wedding colors for
o Bride’s side for traditional wedding;
o Groom’s side for traditional wedding; and
o For the white wedding.
• Inform Your Wedding Party: You don’t need to know every detail of what your bridesmaids and groomsmen will wear at this point, but you do need to ask them this early so they can plan for the expense. Be honest in giving them a sense of what it might cost. Consider either asking on the phone or sending out an e-mail or letter that really expresses why you think they are perfect for the position.
• Guests List: Prepare a guest list and from our experience, expect at least 100 more people to show up (unless you state unequivocally that the wedding is “strictly by invitation” and “no kids are allowed.”
• Choose a Caterer: you need to do this early because Nigerian wedding caterers can typically handle only one wedding per day because of how they are staffed. If you really want a particular caterer, you may want to book before that one is taken.
• Choose a DJ/Live Band for Reception: same issues as with the caterer.
8 To 10 Months Before The Wedding
• Aso-ebi (aka anko): Determine if you’d like your friends to wear similar outfits during your wedding. If you choose to do this at your wedding, here are some tips:
o Choose one of your friends that you trust to handle things from start to finish to coordinate this for you. This could be a really detailed part of the wedding and there are usually lots of questions, so have someone else take care of it.
o Determine the material, head tie etc (alimafabrics.com)
o Ask the coordinator to determine how many people are interested in buying (some people ask only certain people to buy and others open it up to all their friends. It’s all up to you. Remember, though, that some people get really offended if they are not asked and others may feel burdened if they are.)
o Your friends typically will pay for the clothes. If you want something really expensive, though, you may want to consider paying for part of it.
• Buy your wedding dress (and purse, veil, shoes). Make sure the dress meets the dress code of the organization (church/mosque) in which the service will take place - this is very important as you dont want to end up with an expensive dress you cant wear because you did not follow simple rules regarding sleeves, dress color etc.
• Order Bridesmaids dresses
• Book DJ for your wedding ceremony
• Book Photographer
• Book Videographer
• Order wedding cake
• Reserve hotel rooms for out of town guests
• Honeymoon
6 To 8 Months Before The Wedding
• Reserve rental equipment (if you’ll be needing any for the traditional wedding)
• Book hair dresser
• Book someone to do your head tie and make up (your mum and aunties are not necessarily the best people to tie your head tie for you. Look out for people who do a good job and consider paying someone if needed. It’s an Art and not everyone knows how to do it)
• Arrange for help with dressing up in traditional outfits. If you’re Efik, for example, and want to have the pins on your hair, you really must find someone way in advance who will be available that day to do this.
• Create your wedding website (if you plan to have one)
• Register for gifts (not widely practised in Nigeria yet, but you can consider it if you have open minded friends and family)
• Arrange transportation (to wedding ceremony and from wedding ceremony hall to reception). If not booking limos, confirm whose cars you’ll be using and who’ll be driving. We strongly suggest booking a reputable car rental service. Nigerian weddings tend to be all-weekend long affairs and people get tired and stressed. It might be worth the expense to get a car rental service.
o 1 car for bridesmaids and bride
o 1 car for groom and groomsmen
• Order programs
• Order invitations
• Purchase and rent groom and groomsmen’s outfit
• Purchase wedding rings
4 to 6 Months Before the Wedding
• Choose M.C. for traditional wedding and reception
• Give a list of important shots to your wedding photographer
• Discuss your menu with your caterer
• Meet with your officiant to discuss the service
• Write your vows (if there is an option to)
• Send out Wedding Invitations
• Meet with your hairstylist and/or make up stylist to experiment with styles and colors
• If your religious institution requires it, make blood test appointments
• Complete name change documents (if changing names)
• Send wedding announcements to local newspapers
2 to 4 Months Before the Wedding
• Go over your checklist and make sure you are on target.
• Do anything you’ve not done yet
• Apply for a marriage license
Month of the Wedding
• Have a final fitting for your gown (you should have a bridesmaid there to learn how to bustle your train and fasten and buttons)
• Check in with your bridesmaids and groomsmen:
o make sure they have all their outfits,
o confirm when they are arriving,
o patiently answer any last minute questions
• Check in with your vendors: confirm arrival and delivery times
• Make sure you have your wedding program
1 to 2 Weeks Before the Wedding
• Arrange seating plan (most Nigerian weddings just let people sit wherever they want. You might want to leave things that way)
• Let your caterer know the final number of attendees(if known)
• Prepare your toasts for the reception (and rehearsal dinner if having one)
• Break in wedding shoes (by wearing them around the house on the same kind of floor you’d have in the wedding)
• Pick up your dress (make sure it fits)
• Determine decorations for cars
• Practice your dance moves for the wedding(s).
• “Spray Money:” You will dance and it is a given that people will “spray” you. Put a trusted friend or family member in charge of picking up the money and keeping it for you. This amount can be quite substantial and people do it intending for you to get the money and appreciate it. Don’t let little children or plain thieves pick the money for themselves (that said, don’t go after anyone who picks up your money for himself).
• Communicate with the traditional wedding MC and other important guests about your expected order of events for the traditional wedding. This is not so important for yoruba and igbo weddings as many of those occur in the states and everyone pretty much knows what’s supposed to happen. For other cultures or if the bride and groom are from different parts of Nigeria or if one of them is not Nigerian, consider preparing an informal program and informing the MC and parents, and close uncles and aunts on both sides of how you plan for things to go. If not, your igbo uncle may just ask the bride when she’ll be presenting the groom the palm wine at what you intended to be a yoruba styled event.
Traditional Wedding Tips
• if doing this at home, inform your neighbors that you may be loud and plead with them to be understanding.
• Have someone coordinate parking
• No matter how late your in-laws are, don’t get upset at them when they arrive!
• This should go without saying, but don’t raise your voice at anyone. You’re supposed to be extremely good-natured, especially at the traditional wedding. Yelling is totally unacceptable.
1 day Before The Wedding
• Do something to relax and enjoy the company of your out-of-town friends
Assign responsibilities to your wedding party (greeting and seating guests, checking on vendors). Designate people to share your sourveniers/favors. Consider creating packages that include each so you can distribute easily at the wedding.
• Confirm transportation, photographer, make up artist (or hair), caterer, cake, decorator for hall and church, church arrangements
• Have a manicure and pedicure
WEDDING DAY
• Give wake up calls to wedding party• Decorate cars for Wedding Party
• Give gifts to your wedding party
• Enjoy! And take good pictures!
2 - 4 WEEKS AFTER THE WEDDING• Call all the “mommies” and “daddies” that came for your wedding
• Call all members of your wedding party
• Remind your mother to call all the members of the wedding party (it is expected that she will call as well, because it was “her day” after all)• Gradually get to all the guests who gave you gifts
• You should also send thank you notes, but thank you notes don’t appear to be as important in the Nigerian setting as making that phone call to say thank you for coming.
This is Just the Beginning ………Have a Happy Married Life!
******Many people find this checklist very useful and as such we get a lot of reprints. We appreciate that. Should you choose to reprint or republish, please credit FabNaija.com. That's all we ask. Thank you! If you would like a budget tailored to Nigerian weddings, please e-mail alima.okon@hotmail.com and make your subject FABNAIJA BUDGET.
This checklist is tailored to Nigerian weddings. We've attempted to prepare a comprehensive checklist of things to do before a Nigerian-flavored wedding in the U.S. Before you even start going through the checklist, be sure to determine your budget, which will be determined in large part by the number of people you plan to invite. Also, we understand the traditional wedding and the wedding ceremony are both important occasions, however, for convenience, we refer to the traditional wedding as such and to the so-called white wedding as the “Wedding.”
In preparing this schedule, we researched some schedules on other websites, compiled and streamlined them to suit a Nigerian wedding. We really liked the one on this website: http://weddings.about.com/blchecklist1.htm and have included some of their tips. We’ve highlighted things that are specific to a Nigerian wedding.
SCHEDULE OF PREPARATIONS10 to 12 Months Before The Wedding
• Book the wedding hall (fix time, officiant)
• Book time for rehearsal in the wedding hall 1 or 2 days before the wedding
• Book Reception Hall: consider a place close to the wedding hall
• Choose someone to decorate the hall
• Book hall for the traditional wedding: (A good number of people do this wedding within their residences)
• Choose your wedding colors. Remember wedding colors for
o Bride’s side for traditional wedding;
o Groom’s side for traditional wedding; and
o For the white wedding.
• Inform Your Wedding Party: You don’t need to know every detail of what your bridesmaids and groomsmen will wear at this point, but you do need to ask them this early so they can plan for the expense. Be honest in giving them a sense of what it might cost. Consider either asking on the phone or sending out an e-mail or letter that really expresses why you think they are perfect for the position.
• Guests List: Prepare a guest list and from our experience, expect at least 100 more people to show up (unless you state unequivocally that the wedding is “strictly by invitation” and “no kids are allowed.”
• Choose a Caterer: you need to do this early because Nigerian wedding caterers can typically handle only one wedding per day because of how they are staffed. If you really want a particular caterer, you may want to book before that one is taken.
• Choose a DJ/Live Band for Reception: same issues as with the caterer.
8 To 10 Months Before The Wedding
• Aso-ebi (aka anko): Determine if you’d like your friends to wear similar outfits during your wedding. If you choose to do this at your wedding, here are some tips:
o Choose one of your friends that you trust to handle things from start to finish to coordinate this for you. This could be a really detailed part of the wedding and there are usually lots of questions, so have someone else take care of it.
o Determine the material, head tie etc (alimafabrics.com)
o Ask the coordinator to determine how many people are interested in buying (some people ask only certain people to buy and others open it up to all their friends. It’s all up to you. Remember, though, that some people get really offended if they are not asked and others may feel burdened if they are.)
o Your friends typically will pay for the clothes. If you want something really expensive, though, you may want to consider paying for part of it.
• Buy your wedding dress (and purse, veil, shoes). Make sure the dress meets the dress code of the organization (church/mosque) in which the service will take place - this is very important as you dont want to end up with an expensive dress you cant wear because you did not follow simple rules regarding sleeves, dress color etc.
• Order Bridesmaids dresses
• Book DJ for your wedding ceremony
• Book Photographer
• Book Videographer
• Order wedding cake
• Reserve hotel rooms for out of town guests
• Honeymoon
6 To 8 Months Before The Wedding
• Reserve rental equipment (if you’ll be needing any for the traditional wedding)
• Book hair dresser
• Book someone to do your head tie and make up (your mum and aunties are not necessarily the best people to tie your head tie for you. Look out for people who do a good job and consider paying someone if needed. It’s an Art and not everyone knows how to do it)
• Arrange for help with dressing up in traditional outfits. If you’re Efik, for example, and want to have the pins on your hair, you really must find someone way in advance who will be available that day to do this.
• Create your wedding website (if you plan to have one)
• Register for gifts (not widely practised in Nigeria yet, but you can consider it if you have open minded friends and family)
• Arrange transportation (to wedding ceremony and from wedding ceremony hall to reception). If not booking limos, confirm whose cars you’ll be using and who’ll be driving. We strongly suggest booking a reputable car rental service. Nigerian weddings tend to be all-weekend long affairs and people get tired and stressed. It might be worth the expense to get a car rental service.
o 1 car for bridesmaids and bride
o 1 car for groom and groomsmen
• Order programs
• Order invitations
• Purchase and rent groom and groomsmen’s outfit
• Purchase wedding rings
4 to 6 Months Before the Wedding
• Choose M.C. for traditional wedding and reception
• Give a list of important shots to your wedding photographer
• Discuss your menu with your caterer
• Meet with your officiant to discuss the service
• Write your vows (if there is an option to)
• Send out Wedding Invitations
• Meet with your hairstylist and/or make up stylist to experiment with styles and colors
• If your religious institution requires it, make blood test appointments
• Complete name change documents (if changing names)
• Send wedding announcements to local newspapers
2 to 4 Months Before the Wedding
• Go over your checklist and make sure you are on target.
• Do anything you’ve not done yet
• Apply for a marriage license
Month of the Wedding
• Have a final fitting for your gown (you should have a bridesmaid there to learn how to bustle your train and fasten and buttons)
• Check in with your bridesmaids and groomsmen:
o make sure they have all their outfits,
o confirm when they are arriving,
o patiently answer any last minute questions
• Check in with your vendors: confirm arrival and delivery times
• Make sure you have your wedding program
1 to 2 Weeks Before the Wedding
• Arrange seating plan (most Nigerian weddings just let people sit wherever they want. You might want to leave things that way)
• Let your caterer know the final number of attendees(if known)
• Prepare your toasts for the reception (and rehearsal dinner if having one)
• Break in wedding shoes (by wearing them around the house on the same kind of floor you’d have in the wedding)
• Pick up your dress (make sure it fits)
• Determine decorations for cars
• Practice your dance moves for the wedding(s).
• “Spray Money:” You will dance and it is a given that people will “spray” you. Put a trusted friend or family member in charge of picking up the money and keeping it for you. This amount can be quite substantial and people do it intending for you to get the money and appreciate it. Don’t let little children or plain thieves pick the money for themselves (that said, don’t go after anyone who picks up your money for himself).
• Communicate with the traditional wedding MC and other important guests about your expected order of events for the traditional wedding. This is not so important for yoruba and igbo weddings as many of those occur in the states and everyone pretty much knows what’s supposed to happen. For other cultures or if the bride and groom are from different parts of Nigeria or if one of them is not Nigerian, consider preparing an informal program and informing the MC and parents, and close uncles and aunts on both sides of how you plan for things to go. If not, your igbo uncle may just ask the bride when she’ll be presenting the groom the palm wine at what you intended to be a yoruba styled event.
Traditional Wedding Tips
• if doing this at home, inform your neighbors that you may be loud and plead with them to be understanding.
• Have someone coordinate parking
• No matter how late your in-laws are, don’t get upset at them when they arrive!
• This should go without saying, but don’t raise your voice at anyone. You’re supposed to be extremely good-natured, especially at the traditional wedding. Yelling is totally unacceptable.
1 day Before The Wedding
• Do something to relax and enjoy the company of your out-of-town friends
Assign responsibilities to your wedding party (greeting and seating guests, checking on vendors). Designate people to share your sourveniers/favors. Consider creating packages that include each so you can distribute easily at the wedding.
• Confirm transportation, photographer, make up artist (or hair), caterer, cake, decorator for hall and church, church arrangements
• Have a manicure and pedicure
WEDDING DAY
• Give wake up calls to wedding party• Decorate cars for Wedding Party
• Give gifts to your wedding party
• Enjoy! And take good pictures!
2 - 4 WEEKS AFTER THE WEDDING• Call all the “mommies” and “daddies” that came for your wedding
• Call all members of your wedding party
• Remind your mother to call all the members of the wedding party (it is expected that she will call as well, because it was “her day” after all)• Gradually get to all the guests who gave you gifts
• You should also send thank you notes, but thank you notes don’t appear to be as important in the Nigerian setting as making that phone call to say thank you for coming.
This is Just the Beginning ………Have a Happy Married Life!
Monday, September 30, 2013
2013 Wedding Website Challenge
The wedding website challenge is still on. Submit 2013 wedding websites for consideration. Now till October 31, 2013. Thank you
Thursday, May 9, 2013
How to have a Big, Fancy, Expensive (Nigerian) Wedding with $100,000
There are so many articles on how to manage your money when you're planning a wedding ie how to have the wedding of your dreams on a budget. We even have one Here.
But today I got to thinking, what if you truly have a whole lot of money and your life's dream is just to have a fancy wedding. At FabNaija, we love ALL weddings - small, medium, big, over the top. We don't discriminate. I figured, if we have an article on how to manage your money for a Nigerian wedding, we should surely have one how to splurge and do it big if that happens to be your place in life. I've used 100k as a starting point but please feel free to spend more!
It's not a complete budget, but I'm just calling to your attention the things that you could spend even more money on and really really go big or go home.
This budget assumes you'll have 300 people in your wedding, but as a Nigerian, I know you can very easily surpass that number.
(Don't forget to checkout our step by step Wedding Store)
1. Wedding Planner/Coordinator ($8,000): Pick one to help your coordinate all this money you are spending. Without a planner and with this much money, you're just signing up for headaches. Planners sometimes want about 8% of the budget or they may come with a standard fee. I used 8% for this budget.
2. Venue ($10,000): Choose a really good, beautiful, "it's the wedding of all weddings venue." you'll still have to watch the budget because our money is going slowly. For 10k and 300 people, you should be able to get an excellent venue and also cover fancy table covers, napkins, plates, glasses, etc. To put it in context, a really fancy venue in Atlanta for 300 people will go for about $7000. Add fancy table covers, chair covers and napkins and you're easily at $1,500k. Add glass covers, silverware. Add well dressed waiters, nice additional decorations, and it's easy to see how you hit $10,000. If you choose to invite 500 people, you could spend 10k on just the hall
But today I got to thinking, what if you truly have a whole lot of money and your life's dream is just to have a fancy wedding. At FabNaija, we love ALL weddings - small, medium, big, over the top. We don't discriminate. I figured, if we have an article on how to manage your money for a Nigerian wedding, we should surely have one how to splurge and do it big if that happens to be your place in life. I've used 100k as a starting point but please feel free to spend more!
It's not a complete budget, but I'm just calling to your attention the things that you could spend even more money on and really really go big or go home.
This budget assumes you'll have 300 people in your wedding, but as a Nigerian, I know you can very easily surpass that number.
(Don't forget to checkout our step by step Wedding Store)
1. Wedding Planner/Coordinator ($8,000): Pick one to help your coordinate all this money you are spending. Without a planner and with this much money, you're just signing up for headaches. Planners sometimes want about 8% of the budget or they may come with a standard fee. I used 8% for this budget.
2. Venue ($10,000): Choose a really good, beautiful, "it's the wedding of all weddings venue." you'll still have to watch the budget because our money is going slowly. For 10k and 300 people, you should be able to get an excellent venue and also cover fancy table covers, napkins, plates, glasses, etc. To put it in context, a really fancy venue in Atlanta for 300 people will go for about $7000. Add fancy table covers, chair covers and napkins and you're easily at $1,500k. Add glass covers, silverware. Add well dressed waiters, nice additional decorations, and it's easy to see how you hit $10,000. If you choose to invite 500 people, you could spend 10k on just the hall
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Where to Find a Good Single Nigerian Man/Woman?
They say all the good ones are taken. Mmmm. You said that last year but someone found a good one 3 weeks later so you're starting to wonder if it's you. Maybe just maybe they are running away from you. Not True. I considered making the topic of this blog "Where to find a good single man/woman? But that's not what you're searching for when you check google because fact is you want a Nigerian. You're Nigerian and you want one too. Some people don't care, but you do. Except you want him to be a little bit "Americanized."
Just a little but not to much. Hian. Dis tin is getting tougher. So you watch the accent, you watch the mannerisms, you watch whether she cooks and what she cooks because once again, you said you want her to be a bit Americanized...but not all the way (and someone has told you American girls don't cook for their men). Not even Rachael Ray with all her 30 minute throw downs can convince you otherwise. In fact, I just made your point anyway cause what kind of good meal takes 30minutes to make. Surely not your mama's Egusi soup that you're hoping this slightly Americanized girl can make.
But I digress, this is not about you, it's about where to find the ONE. Without much ado, we present some ways and places.
1) Online dating and dating services: eharmony, blackpeoplemeet, pof, africanlove, match.com You're rich....go ahead and pay someone to do the job for you. (as with all things that start online, be careful. Even dis my advice sef, careful as you take am)
2) Still online, join meetup.com. Join a group and meet someone.
3) Church/Mosque: to make this effective, do join a group or house fellowship in the church. Just showing up every sunday won't help with getting to know people. I should take my own advice. LOL
4) Volunteer: volunteer doing something that you love to do and if you want to strategize real well volunteer in an activity that tends to attract guys/girls. depend on which one you dey find
5) Good grocery store: Yes I said good. I'm trying to help you here. My focus is not on helping the store but on you. You can check out your local African food store. Hey if a guy seems like he's looking for the fufu. Feel free to show him where it is and ask who he'll be cooking for. If he says my wife sent me to get it....well what are you waiting for? Move On. If he says, "do you want to cook it for me?" Well you can work with him. If he says, "I'll be cooking for me and you." Well, I don't have to teach you everything now do I? :)
6) Tell your good friends to hook you up. Don't be shy. Go ahead
7) Visit Nigeria during christmas. Families are known to sometimes visit then and your prince(ss) may be doing the same. This involves quite a bit of cash and you must limit your expectations, if not your disappointment may be high if you don't meet anyone there. Plus there are other people doing the same so competition may be fierce. But you're the "ish," so why not.
8) Attend events and please stay till the party time
9) Join an organization that serves a smaller part of the Nigerian community in the country. Join a group for Ibos, for Akwa Ibom people, for Nigerian doctors, for lawyers, for Nurses. These groups are good for you anyway and they could also help you meet the ONE
10) Pray, be patient, but please say hi to guys/girls you may not even be interested in. Just enjoy your life
Just a little but not to much. Hian. Dis tin is getting tougher. So you watch the accent, you watch the mannerisms, you watch whether she cooks and what she cooks because once again, you said you want her to be a bit Americanized...but not all the way (and someone has told you American girls don't cook for their men). Not even Rachael Ray with all her 30 minute throw downs can convince you otherwise. In fact, I just made your point anyway cause what kind of good meal takes 30minutes to make. Surely not your mama's Egusi soup that you're hoping this slightly Americanized girl can make.
But I digress, this is not about you, it's about where to find the ONE. Without much ado, we present some ways and places.
1) Online dating and dating services: eharmony, blackpeoplemeet, pof, africanlove, match.com You're rich....go ahead and pay someone to do the job for you. (as with all things that start online, be careful. Even dis my advice sef, careful as you take am)
2) Still online, join meetup.com. Join a group and meet someone.
3) Church/Mosque: to make this effective, do join a group or house fellowship in the church. Just showing up every sunday won't help with getting to know people. I should take my own advice. LOL
4) Volunteer: volunteer doing something that you love to do and if you want to strategize real well volunteer in an activity that tends to attract guys/girls. depend on which one you dey find
5) Good grocery store: Yes I said good. I'm trying to help you here. My focus is not on helping the store but on you. You can check out your local African food store. Hey if a guy seems like he's looking for the fufu. Feel free to show him where it is and ask who he'll be cooking for. If he says my wife sent me to get it....well what are you waiting for? Move On. If he says, "do you want to cook it for me?" Well you can work with him. If he says, "I'll be cooking for me and you." Well, I don't have to teach you everything now do I? :)
6) Tell your good friends to hook you up. Don't be shy. Go ahead
7) Visit Nigeria during christmas. Families are known to sometimes visit then and your prince(ss) may be doing the same. This involves quite a bit of cash and you must limit your expectations, if not your disappointment may be high if you don't meet anyone there. Plus there are other people doing the same so competition may be fierce. But you're the "ish," so why not.
8) Attend events and please stay till the party time
9) Join an organization that serves a smaller part of the Nigerian community in the country. Join a group for Ibos, for Akwa Ibom people, for Nigerian doctors, for lawyers, for Nurses. These groups are good for you anyway and they could also help you meet the ONE
10) Pray, be patient, but please say hi to guys/girls you may not even be interested in. Just enjoy your life
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